Home > Sleep Environment > Sleeping Partners

Sleeping Partners

By: Wendy Jacob - Updated: 7 Oct 2010 | comments*Discuss
 
Body Temperature Circadian Rhythms

Sharing a bed with a partner can help you sleep. The comfort, warmth and security of a good nights sleep with someone you are close to may make it hard for you to sleep apart. For others sleeping together can be a nightmare, with one or both partners suffering from difficulty falling or staying asleep.

Sleep and Sex

The one exception to the 'bed is for sleep' rule is of course, sex. Sex is for many a prelude to a good nights sleep. Men usually find it easier to sleep after sex than women. Some women find that sex leaves them feeling stimulated and unable to sleep. Anthropologists have suggested that this is because man 'the hunter' would sleep in his woman's arms after sex while she kept watch for predators. With the absence of predators in most bedrooms it is frustrating lying awake as your partner sleeps soundly.

This may cause few problems in the short term but long term sleep loss will affect health. Sex at other times may be the answer - morning sex is a great way to start the day!

Many women feel too exhausted to have sex, and lack of sleep can affect relationships. The connection between bed and sex means that stresses in the relationship are taken into the bedroom. This is detrimental to a good nights sleep.

Stress affects the ability to sleep well leading to sleep debt. This may make both partners irritable and lead to further strain within the relationship. Lack of sleep affects our emotions and our sex drive. This need for sleep is often unrecognised as a contributing factor in relationship problems. Partners may continue to share the same bed suffering sleepless nights and feeling increasingly isolated and distressed.

Sleeping Differences

The challenge of having a decent nights sleep with another person increases if there are substantial differences in body clock and sleeping patterns. Even a good sleeper will be affected by outside factors such as noise, temperature and light.

Poor sleepers will find sleeping with a partner more of a challenge. Lying awake watching your partner sleeping peacefully can be extremely frustrating!

Differences in circadian rhythms mean that partners feel sleepy at different times and may need to go to bed, and rise at different times.

Sleep disturbances that cause restlessness may disrupt the other partner's sleep causing both partners to suffer from lack of sleep.

Snoring and Sleep Apnea are likely to affect a partner's ability to fall asleep and their sleep quality. Both conditions may affect the partner's transitions between deeper and light sleep causing loss of sleep quality.

Physical differences such as weight and body temperature may affect the choice of bed and bedding. Personal preferences may make it necessary to create subtle differences in the sleeping environment. Many couples find tow duvets and different pillows solve the bedding fights!

Sleep masks and earplugs are useful if one partner is particularly sensitive to light and noise.

Some couples find that allowing one partner to go to bed and fall asleep first helps ensure a good nights sleep. For others, the occasional night in a separate room is enough to catch up on sleep debt. Finding a night time routine that suits both partners and ensures a good night's sleep is essential for any relationship.

You might also like...
Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice..
Why not be the first to leave a comment for discussion, ask for advice or share your story...

If you'd like to ask a question one of our experts (workload permitting) or a helpful reader hopefully can help you... We also love comments and interesting stories

Title:
(never shown)
Firstname:
(never shown)
Surname:
(never shown)
Email:
(never shown)
Nickname:
(shown)
Comment:
Validate:
Enter word:
Topics
Latest Comments
  • Ruggero
    Re: Dehydration and Insomnia
    Causality here can easily trick our minds. An inverse association between thirst and insomnia is known. This does not necessarily mean…
    28 October 2017
  • Lizzy Lu
    Re: Dehydration and Insomnia
    I suffer from pulmonary aspiration and can only handle about a cup of liquids per day. I have been chronically dehydrated since March,…
    28 July 2017
  • princess baby saedie
    Re: Feeling Too Cold to Sleep
    At night I can't sleep. I look up somuch stuff to help. I just got out of a brace about a week ago from spraining my ankle. I've…
    27 July 2017
  • Joiseyg
    Re: Dehydration and Insomnia
    Being dehydrated makes me feel exhausted so I usually drink water when I'm at that point. I drink 40-60 oz a day and have had a hard…
    10 September 2016
  • Insomniacs
    Re: Sleeping Pills - Addiction and Withdrawal
    Mary - Your Question:I was diagnosed with an Auto Immune disease in 2005 and was placed on large doses of…
    7 September 2016
  • Mary
    Re: Sleeping Pills - Addiction and Withdrawal
    I was diagnosed with an Auto Immune disease in 2005 and was placed on large doses of Prednisone, along with other…
    7 September 2016
  • Insomniacs
    Re: Sleeping Pills - Addiction and Withdrawal
    Twisty - Your Question:I have been taking zoplicone for almost. 3 yrs and want to stop how do withdraw from the…
    23 August 2016
  • Twisty
    Re: Sleeping Pills - Addiction and Withdrawal
    I have been taking zoplicone for almost. 3 yrs and want to stop how do withdraw from the pills in a safe and…
    22 August 2016
  • Insomniacs
    Re: A Holistic Approach to Insomnia
    Foggy - Your Question:Hi I need some serious help please. I have not slept now at all in nearly 3 weeks. I realised I had…
    8 August 2016
  • Foggy
    Re: A Holistic Approach to Insomnia
    hi I need some serious help please. I have not slept now at all in nearly 3 weeks. I realised I had sleep problems and so…
    7 August 2016
Further Reading...
Our Most Popular...
Add to my Yahoo!
Add to Google
Stumble this
Add to Twitter
Add To Facebook
RSS feed
You should seek independent professional advice before acting upon any information on the Insomniacs website. Please read our Disclaimer.